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challenge coupled with the name of one recognisable spot； replied to by
the haphazard retort of another place； frequently in no way joined to it；
was regarded as an exceptionally fascinating sit…round game by a company
of elderly barbarians！
〃What couldn't Walbrook？〃 it might be； and 〃Such Cheapside；〃 would
be deemed a praiseworthy solution。 〃When did King's Bench Walk？〃
would be asked； and to reply； 〃When Gray's Inn Road；〃 covered the one
with overpowering acclamation。 〃Bevis Marks only an Inner Circle at The
Butts； why？〃 was a demand of such elaborate complexity that （although
this person was lured out of his self…imposed restraint by the silence of all
round； and submerging his intelligence to an acquired level； unobtrusively
suggested； 〃Because Aylesbury ducks； perchance〃） it fell to the one
propounding to announce； 〃Because St。 John's Wood Shoot…up Hill。〃
Admittedly it is written； 〃When the shutter is fastened the girdle is
loosened；〃 but it is as truly said； 〃Not in the head； nor yet in the feet； but in
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the organs of digestion does wisdom reside；〃 and even in jesting the
middle course of neither an excessive pride nor an absolute weak…
mindedness is to be observed。 With what concrete pangs of acute mental
distress would this person ever behold his immaculate progenitor taking
part in a similar sit…round game with an assembly of worthy mandarins；
the one asking questions of meaningless import； as 〃Why did they
Hangkow？〃 and another replying in an equal strain of no consecutiveness；
〃In order to T'in Tung！〃
At length a person who is spoken of as having formerly been the
captain of a band of warriors turned to me with an unsuspected absence of
ferocity and said； 〃Your countrymen are very proficient in the art of
epigram； are they not； Mr。 Kong？ Will you not； in turn； therefore； favour
us with an example？〃 Whereupon several maidens exclaimed with
engaging high temper； 〃Oh yes； do ask us some funny Chinese riddles； Mr。
Kong！〃
〃Assuredly there are among us many classical instances of the light
sayings which require matching；〃 I replied； gratified that I should have the
opportunity of showing their superiority。 〃One； harmonious beyond the
blend of challenge and retort； is as follows'The Phoenix embroidered
upon the side of the shoe： When the shoe advances the Phoenix leaps
forward。'〃
〃Oh！〃 cried several of the maidens； and from the nature of their
glances it might reasonably be gathered that already they began to
recognise the inferiority of their own sayings。
〃Is that the question； or the answer； or both？〃 asked a youth of
unfledged maturity； and to hide their conscious humiliation several
persons allowed their faces to melt away。
〃That which has been expressed；〃 replied this person with an
ungrudging toleration； 〃is the first or question portion of the contrast。 The
answer is that which will be supplied by your honourable condescension。〃
〃But；〃 interposed one of the maidens； 〃it isn't really a question； you
know； Mr。 Kong。〃
〃In a way of regarding it； it may be said to be question； inasmuch as it
requires an answer to establish the comparison。 The most pleasing answer
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is that which shall be dissimilar in idea； and yet at the same time maintain
the most perfect harmony of parallel thought；〃 I replied。 〃Now permit your
exceptional minds to wander in a forest of similitudes： 'The Phoenix
embroidered upon the side of the shoe： When the shoe advances the
Phoenix leaps forward。'〃
〃Oh； if that's all you want；〃 said the one Herbert； who by an ill destiny
chanced to be present； 〃'The red…hot poker held before the Cat's nose：
When the poker advances the Cat leaps backwards。'〃
〃Oh； very good！〃 cried several of those around； 〃of course it naturally
would。 Is that right； Mr。 Kong？〃
〃If the high…souled company is satisfied； then it must be； for there is no
conclusive right or wrongonly an unending search for that which is most
gem…set and resourceful；〃 replied this person； with an ever…deepening
conviction of no enthusiasm towards the sit…round game。 〃But；〃 he added；
resolved to raise for a moment the canopy of a mind swan…like in its
crystal many…sidedness； and then leave them to their own ineptitude； 〃for
five centuries nothing has been judged equal to the solution offered by Li
Tang。 At the time he was presented with a three…sided banner of silk with
the names of his eleven immediate ancestors embroidered upon it in seven
colours； and his own name is still handed down in imperishable memory。〃
〃Oh； do tell us what it was；〃 cried many。 〃It must have been clever。〃
〃'The Dragon painted upon the face of the fan： When the fan is shaken
the Dragon flies upwards；'〃 replied this person。
It cannot be denied that this was received with an attitude of respectful
melancholy strikingly complimentary to the wisdom of the gifted Li Tang。
But whether it may be that the time was too short to assimilate the more
subtle delicacies of the saying； or whether the barbarian mind is inherently
devoid of true balance； this person was panged most internally to hear one
say to another as he went out； 〃Do you know； I really think that Herbert's
was much the better answer of the twomore realistic； and what you
might expect at the pantomime。〃 *
A like inability to grasp with a clear and uninvolved vision； permeates
not only the triviality of a sit…round game but even the most important
transactions of existence。 Shortly after his arrival in the Island； this person
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was initiated by the widely…esteemed Quang…Tsun into the private life of
one whose occupation was that of a Law…giver； where he frequently drank
tea on terms of mutual cordiality。 Upon such an occasion he was one day
present； conversing with the lesser ones of the householdthe head thereof
being absent； setting forth the Law in the Templewhen one of the
maidens cried out with amiable vivacity； 〃Why； Mr。 Kong； you say such
consistently graceful things of the ladies you have met over here； that we
shall expect you to take back an English wife with you。 But perhaps you
are already married in China？〃
〃The conclusion is undeviating in its accuracy；〃 replied this person；
unable to evade the allusion。 〃To Ning； Hia…Fa and T'ain Yen； as the matter
stands。〃
〃Ning Hia…Fa An T'ain Yen！〃 exclaimed the wife of the Law…giver
pleasantly。 〃What an important name。 Can you pardon our curiosity and
tell us what she is like？〃
〃Ning； Hia…Fa AND T'ain Yen；〃 repeated this person； not submitting to
be deprived of the consequence of two wives without due protest。 〃Three
names； three wives。 Three very widely separated likes。〃
At this in no way boastfully uttered statement the agreeably outlined
surface of the faces around variated suddenly； the effect being one which I
have frequently observed in the midst of my politest expressions of felicity。
For a moment； indeed； I could not disguise from myself that the one who
had made the inquiry stretched forth her lotus…like hand towards the secret
spring by which it is customary to summon the attending slaves from the
underneath parts； but restraining herself with the manner of one who
would desire to make less of a thing that it otherwise might seem； she
turned to me again。
〃How nice！〃 she murmured。 〃What a pity you did not bring them all
with you； Mr。 Kong。 They would have been a great acquisition。〃
〃Yet it must be well weighed；〃 I replied； not to be out…complimented
touching one another； 〃that here they would have met so many fine and
superior gentlemen that they might have become dissatisfied with my less
than average preposses