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that minute； I had deposited in my own mind as a fact worth
remembering。 Neither had Bottles ever taken the least notice of
any of our many uproars。 An imperturbable and speechless man； he
had sat at his supper； with Streaker present in a swoon； and the
Odd Girl marble； and had only put another potato in his cheek； or
profited by the general misery to help himself to beefsteak pie。
〃And so；〃 continued my sister； 〃I exempt Bottles。 And considering；
John； that the house is too large； and perhaps too lonely； to be
kept well in hand by Bottles； you； and me； I propose that we cast
about among our friends for a certain selected number of the most
reliable and willingform a Society here for three monthswait
upon ourselves and one anotherlive cheerfully and sociallyand
see what happens。〃
I was so charmed with my sister； that I embraced her on the spot；
and went into her plan with the greatest ardor。
We were then in the third week of November； but； we took our
measures so vigorously； and were so well seconded by the friends in
whom we confided； that there was still a week of the month
unexpired； when our party all came down together merrily； and
mustered in the haunted house。
I will mention； in this place； two small changes that I made while
my sister and I were yet alone。 It occurring to me as not
improbable that Turk howled in the house at night； partly because
he wanted to get out of it； I stationed him in his kennel outside；
but unchained； and I seriously warned the village that any man who
came in his way must not expect to leave him without a rip in his
own throat。 I then casually asked Ikey if he were a judge of a
gun？ On his saying； 〃Yes； sir； I knows a good gun when I sees
her；〃 I begged the favor of his stepping up to the house and
looking at mine。
〃SHE'S a true one； sir；〃 said Ikey； after inspecting a double…
barrelled rifle that I bought in New York a few years ago。 〃No
mistake about HER； sir。〃
〃Ikey；〃 said I； 〃don't mention it； I have seen something in this
house。〃
〃No； sir？〃 he whispered； greedily opening his eyes。 〃'Ooded lady；
sir？〃
〃Don't be frightened；〃 said I。 〃It was a figure rather like you。〃
〃Lord； sir？〃
〃Ikey！〃 said I； shaking hands with him warmly； I may say
affectionately； 〃if there is any truth in these ghost…stories； the
greatest service I can do you； is； to fire at that figure。 And I
promise you； by Heaven and earth； I will do it with this gun if I
see it again！〃
The young man thanked me； and took his leave with some little
precipitation； after declining a glass of liquor。 I imparted my
secret to him； because I had never quite forgotten his throwing his
cap at the bell； because I had； on another occasion； noticed
something very like a fur cap； lying not far from the bell； one
night when it had burst out ringing； and because I had remarked
that we were at our ghostliest whenever he came up in the evening
to comfort the servants。 Let me do Ikey no injustice。 He was
afraid of the house； and believed in its being haunted； and yet he
would play false on the haunting side； so surely as he got an
opportunity。 The Odd Girl's case was exactly similar。 She went
about the house in a state of real terror； and yet lied monstrously
and wilfully； and invented many of the alarms she spread； and made
many of the sounds we heard。 I had had my eye on the two； and I
know it。 It is not necessary for me； here； to account for this
preposterous state of mind； I content myself with remarking that it
is familiarly known to every intelligent man who has had fair
medical； legal； or other watchful experience； that it is as well
established and as common a state of mind as any with which
observers are acquainted； and that it is one of the first elements；
above all others； rationally to be suspected in； and strictly
looked for； and separated from； any question of this kind。
To return to our party。 The first thing we did when we were all
assembled； was； to draw lots for bedrooms。 That done； and every
bedroom； and； indeed； the whole house； having been minutely
examined by the whole body； we allotted the various household
duties； as if we had been on a gipsy party； or a yachting party； or
a hunting party； or were shipwrecked。 I then recounted the
floating rumors concerning the hooded lady； the owl； and Master B。：
with others； still more filmy； which had floated about during our
occupation； relative to some ridiculous old ghost of the female
gender who went up and down； carrying the ghost of a round table；
and also to an impalpable Jackass； whom nobody was ever able to
catch。 Some of these ideas I really believe our people below had
communicated to one another in some diseased way； without conveying
them in words。 We then gravely called one another to witness； that
we were not there to be deceived； or to deceivewhich we
considered pretty much the same thingand that； with a serious
sense of responsibility； we would be strictly true to one another；
and would strictly follow out the truth。 The understanding was
established； that any one who heard unusual noises in the night；
and who wished to trace them； should knock at my door； lastly； that
on Twelfth Night； the last night of holy Christmas； all our
individual experiences since that then present hour of our coming
together in the haunted house； should be brought to light for the
good of all； and that we would hold our peace on the subject till
then； unless on some remarkable provocation to break silence。
We were； in number and in character； as follows：
Firstto get my sister and myself out of the waythere were we
two。 In the drawing of lots； my sister drew her own room； and I
drew Master B。's。 Next； there was our first cousin John Herschel；
so called after the great astronomer： than whom I suppose a better
man at a telescope does not breathe。 With him； was his wife： a
charming creature to whom he had been married in the previous
spring。 I thought it （under the circumstances） rather imprudent to
bring her； because there is no knowing what even a false alarm may
do at such a time； but I suppose he knew his own business best； and
I must say that if she had been MY wife； I never could have left
her endearing and bright face behind。 They drew the Clock Room。
Alfred Starling； an uncommonly agreeable young fellow of eight…and…
twenty for whom I have the greatest liking； was in the Double Room；
mine； usually； and designated by that name from having a dressing…
room within it； with two large and cumbersome windows； which no
wedges I was ever able to make； would keep from shaking； in any
weather； wind or no wind。 Alfred is a young fellow who pretends to
be 〃fast〃 （another word for loose； as I understand the term）； but
who is much too good and sensible for that nonsense； and who would
have distinguished himself before now； if his father had not
unfortunately left him a small independence of two hundred a year；
on the strength of which his only occupation in life has been to
spend six。 I am in hopes； however； that his Banker may break； or
that he may enter into some speculation guaranteed to pay twenty
per cent。； for； I am convinced that if he could only be ruined； his
fortune is made。 Belinda Bates； bosom friend of my sister； and a
most intellectual； amiable； and delightful girl； got the Picture
Room。 She has a fine genius for poetry； combined with real
business earnestness； and 〃goes in〃to use an expression of
Alfred'sfor Woman's mission； Woman's rights； Woman's wrongs； and
everything that is woman's with a capital W； or is not and ought to
be； or is and ought not to be。 〃Most praiseworthy； my dear； and
Heaven prosper you！〃 I whispered to her on the first night of my
taking leave of her at the Picture…Room door； 〃but don't overdo it。
And in respect of the great necessity there is； my darling； for
more employments being within the reach of Woman than our
civilisation has as yet assigned to her； don't fly at the
unfortunate men； even those men who are at first sight in your way；
as if they were the natural oppressors of your sex； for； trust me；
Belinda； they do sometimes spend their wages among wives and
daughters； sisters； mothers； aunts； and grandmothers； and the play
is； really； not ALL Wolf and Red Riding…Hood； but has other parts
in it。〃 However； I digress。
Belinda； as I have mentioned； occupied the Picture Room。 We had
but three other chambers： the Corner Room； the Cupboard Room； and
the Garden Room。 My old friend； Jack Governor； 〃slung his
hammock；〃 as he called it； in the Corner Room。 I have always
regarded Jack as the finest…looking sailor that ever sailed。 He is
gray now； but as handsome as he was a quarter of a century ago
nay； handsomer。 A portly； cheery； well…built figure of a broad…
shouldered man； with a frank smile； a brilliant dark eye； and a
rich dark eyebrow。 I remember those under darker hair； and they
look all the better for their silver setting。 He has been wherever
his Union namesake flies； has Jack； and I have met old shipmates of
his； away in the Mediterranean and on the other side of the
Atlantic； who have beamed and brightened at the casual mention of
his name； and have cried； 〃