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like the place altogether。 I have been very negligent—but are you
now at leisure to satisfy me in these particulars？ If you are I will
begin directly。”
“You need not give yourself that trouble； sir。”
“No trouble； I assure you； madam。” Then forming his features
into a set smile； and affectedly softening his voice； he added； with a
simpering air； “Have you been long in Bath； madam？”
“About a week； sir；” replied Catherine； trying not to laugh。
“Really！” with affected astonishment。
“Why should you be surprised； sir？”
“Why； indeed！” said he； in his natural tone—“but some emotion
must appear to be raised by your reply； and surprise is more easily
assumed； and not less reasonable than any other。—Now let us go
on。 Were you never here before； madam？”
“Never； sir。”
“Indeed！ Have you yet honoured the Upper Rooms？”
“Yes； sir； I was there last Monday。”
“Have you been to the theatre？”
“Yes； sir； I was at the play on Tuesday。”
“To the concert？”
“Yes； sir； on Wednesday。”
“And are you altogether pleased with Bath？”
“Yes—I like it very well。”
“Now I must give one smirk； and then we may be rational
again。”
Catherine turned away her head； not knowing whether she
might venture to laugh。
“I see what you think of me；” said he gravely—“I shall make but
a poor figure in your journal tomorrow。”
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“My journal！”
“Yes； I know exactly what you will say： Friday； went to the
Lower Rooms； wore my sprigged muslin robe with blue
trimmings—plain black shoes—appeared to much advantage； but
was strangely harassed by a queer； half…witted man； who would
make me dance with him； and distressed me by his nonsense。”
“Indeed I shall say no such thing。”
“Shall I tell you what you ought to say？”
“If you please。”
“I danced with a very agreeable young man； introduced by Mr。
King； had a great deal of conversation with him—seems a most
extraordinary genius—hope I may know more of him。 That；
madam； is what I wish you to say。”
“But； perhaps； I keep no journal。”
“Perhaps you are not sitting in this room； and I am not sitting
by you。 These are points in which a doubt is equally possible。 Not
keep a journal！ How are your absent cousins to understand the
tenour of your life in Bath without one？ How are the civilities and
compliments of every day to be related as they ought to be； unless
noted down every evening in a journal？ How are your various
dresses to be remembered； and the particular state of your
complexion； and curl of your hair to be described in all their
diversities； without having constant recourse to a journal？—My
dear madam； I am not so ignorant of young ladies’ ways as you
wish to believe me； it is this delightful habit of journalizing which
largely contributes to form the easy style of writing for which
ladies are so generally celebrated。 Every body allows that the
talent of writing agreeable letters is peculiarly female。 Nature may
have done something； but I am sure it must be essentially assisted
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by the practice of keeping a journal。”
“I have sometimes thought；” said Catherine； doubtingly；
“whether ladies do write so much better letters than gentlemen！
That is—I should not think the superiority was always on our
side。”
“As far as I have had opportunity of judging； it appears to me
that the usual style of letter…writing among women is faultless；
except in three particulars。”
“And what are they？”
“A general deficiency of subject； a total inattention to stops； and
a very frequent ignorance of grammar。”
“Upon my word！ I need not have been afraid of disclaiming the
compliment。 You do not think too highly of us in that way。”
“I should no more lay it down as a general rule that women
write better letters than men； than that they sing better duets； or
draw better landscapes。 In every power； of which taste is the
foundation； excellence is pretty fairly divided between the sexes。”
They were interrupted by Mrs。 Allen：—“My dear Catherine；”
said she； “do take this pin out of my sleeve； I am afraid it has torn
a hole already； I shall be quite sorry if it has； for this is a favourite
gown； though it cost but nine shillings a yard。”
“That is exactly what I should have guessed it； madam；” said
Mr。 Tilney； looking at the muslin。
“Do you understand muslins； sir？”
“Particularly well； I always buy my own cravats； and am
allowed to be an excellent judge； and my sister has often trusted
me in the choice of a gown。 I bought one for her the other day； and
it was pronounced to be a prodigious bargain by every lady who
saw it。 I gave but five shillings a yard for it； and a true Indian
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muslin。”
Mrs。 Allen was quite struck by his genius。 “Men commonly take
so little notice of those things；” said she： “I can never get Mr。 Allen
to know one of my gowns from another。 You must be a great
comfort to your sister； sir。”
“I hope I am； madam。”
“And pray； sir； what do you think of Miss Morland’s gown？”
“It is very pretty； madam；” said he； gravely examining it； “but I
do not think it will wash well； I am afraid it will fray。”
“How can you；” said Catherine； laughing； “be so—” she had
almost said “strange。”
“I am quite of your opinion； sir；” replied Mrs。 Allen： “and so I
told Miss Morland when she bought it。”
“But then you know； madam； muslin always turns to some
account or other； Miss Morland will get enough out of it for a
handkerchief； or a cap； or a cloak。—Muslin can never be said to be
wasted。 I have heard my sister say so forty times； when she has
been extravagant in buying more than she wanted； or careless in
cutting it to pieces。”
“Bath is a charming place； sir； there are so many good shops
here。—We are sadly off in the country； not but what we have very
good shops in Salisbury； but it is so far to go—eight miles is a long
way； Mr。 Allen says it is nine； measured nine； but I am sure it
cannot be more than eight； and it is such a fag—I come back tired
to death。 Now； here one can step out of doors and get a thing in
five minutes。”
Mr。 Tilney was polite enough to seem interested in what she
said； and she kept him on the subject of muslins till the dancing
recommenced。 Catherine feared； as she listened to their discourse；
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that he indulged himself a little too much with the foibles of
others。—“What are you thinking of so earnestly？” said he； as they
walked back to the ball…room；—“not of your partner； I hope； for；
by that shake of the head； your meditations are not satisfactory。”
Catherine coloured； and said； “I was not thinking of anything。”
“That is artful and deep； to be sure； but I had rather be told at
once that you will not tell me。”
“Well then； I will not。”
“Thank you； for now we shall soon be acquainted； as I am
authorized to tease you on this subject whenever we meet； and
nothing in the world advances intimacy so much。”
They danced again； and； when the assembly closed； parted； on
the lady’s side at least； with a strong inclination for contin